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翻了薛老师以前在贴吧发的帖子，找了几条有趣的截下来留着看。

2008年的薛老师为了世界和平操碎了心。没事的时候撺掇谦友逃课放飞自我，汶川受灾却能站出来身体力行号召谦友大爱无疆，有钱买专辑不如拿钱捐灾区，彼时直线救灾，日后曲线救歌，谁说人生不是黑色幽默，伏笔长长一线，万事暗自关联。“为了xx，我的专辑你们就不要买了”，这个句式实在熟悉，薛老师作为歌手的套路大概就是“你们负责听歌，赚钱的麻烦事就交给我”，可歌可泣。

2010年的薛老师依然保有通宵刷留言的好习惯，交流意愿强烈却时常力不从心，打字慢得不行还捎带不少错字，学习半年回帖贴图技能点依旧暗淡，经网友点拨终于晓得Ctrl+c再加v可以在回复...

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\\n2008年的薛老师为了世界和平操碎了心。没事的时候撺掇谦友逃课放飞自我，汶川受灾却能站出来身体力行号召谦友大爱无疆，有钱买专辑不如拿钱捐灾区，彼时直线救灾，日后曲线救歌，谁说人生不是黑色幽默，伏笔长长一线，万事暗自关联。“为了xx，我的专辑你们就不要买了”，这个句式实在熟悉，薛老师作为歌手的套路大概就是“你们负责听歌，赚钱的麻烦事就交给我”，可歌可泣。 \\n2010年的薛老师依然保有通宵刷留言的好习惯，交流意愿强烈却时常力不从心，打字慢得不行还捎带不少错字，学习半年回帖贴图技能点依旧暗淡，经网友点拨终于晓得Ctrl+c再加v可以在回复时携带对方发帖内容，却依然固执地忘记复制分割线，将好端端一段对口攒成长诗一篇，实力演示人格分裂临床表现。然而，一篇博客日志都要写两个小时的薛老师却怀揣着跻身文坛的梦想，筹划个人长篇小说的同时不忘捉刀《俄罗斯长篇大论》，原定连载二十篇谁料中道夭折，孤零零的四篇游记摆在那儿，尾巴说好“敬请期待第五篇”也成了说说而已，甚至算不上个承诺，只是个美好的企盼，说说就算的小玩笑。 \\n2007年的薛老师为退出娱乐圈的自己想好出路，退居二线专心给别人写曲子，开家小店铺过普通人的日子，等到08年再被问到“今年的期望和打算”，直言“打算……就是做一个歌手”，这两个词之间总归有些微妙区别，打算比期望听起来更幸运一点儿，站在2016年往回看，不知道他的打算有没有成真，还是后退一步变成了无可奈何的期望。 \\n三只大闸蟹五只嘉兴粽，五碗泡饭六颗咸蛋，俄罗斯泡面和温州鸭舌，热爱食物才能拥抱生命，能吃能睡连神经衰弱都能不药而愈；最爱松狮和比熊，看到雪纳瑞也要动心。知道了些许鸡零狗碎，你会发现许多你以为他从未说过的，早就被他给出了答案。 \\n人人知道时间是单向矢量，时间里的种种却从来不是昙花一现，总有些东西伴随着时间中的我们一同被留下，你能透过它们瞥见过去的影子，就像一只眼贴在红漆木门外头，顺着罅隙往里瞧，可能使了牛劲最多看见个青砖地椅子腿，但比起站在旁边冷眼旁观的过路人，你就是能产生天大的高兴，一种不可与人言的喜悦，这些互不相关的零碎让你的想象有了方向，仿佛青砖地还是七架梁，是无光自鲜明的画壁，闭上眼就能嗅见黄花梨的清香味儿，不矫饰，不做作。 \\n我不敢断言他是个怎样的人，往天上捧更是无论如何也做不到。人就是这样，不大个身子盛着几多好坏，好的可能极好，坏的不至于极坏却也能让没缘分的人倒了胃口。有人急躁，有人笨拙，有人只在遇见挚爱的时刻才敢放下计算，有人一念执着，心里的魔障敲也敲不开，有人长一颗嫩豆腐似的心，却时刻骗自己是颗煮过了火的硬壳蛋，凡此种种，是不是蠢，是，可你能指责他些什么，你做不出，一句狠话都说不出口，因为你知道种因得果，你是，他是，人人都是。 \\n当下为人有多圆滑，过去就吃过多少苦，许多人都是这样。唱歌画画写文章的人都有压制不住的倾诉欲，有太多话想说，说了才能活，这样的人说起话来几十句里却只能有两句是真心实意的，是曾经让他疼过的，可满纸荒唐言只有这两句最令观者捧腹，这种事总会让我对这个世界更失望一分。 \\n人心里的火就是这么萎缩得半死不活。 \\n有人翻出他过去不当的言行，拿在手里二话不说就伸出指头点名他是个坏种。这话反驳起来简单，也困难。我可以列举二十条证据只为告诉人家“他是个好人”，即使放在统计学概念下不敢把话说死，这也应该算是大概率事件，但人家只说一句话就能让我哑口无言，“我不相信”。 \\n挺没劲的，真的。 \\n本来只想随意记三两个薛老师生命中的小瞬间，谁知道一写写到又要看日出，讲的这些废话丝毫不敢以理中客自居，巨蟹座生来护犊子，两位老师都是我豁出脸不要也要护着的，最后理所当然要说点儿毫无依据的表扬，反正困傻的女青年胡说胡有理。 \\n薛老师的笑话总离不开动物，大小动物不忌尺寸不顾美丑，小猫小狗犀牛河马，但凡他想起来的就要说，对此我有理由相信一个擅长无意识热爱大自然的青年必定是个天性善良的好青年，而不是一个只有在说“肉包子打狗”的时候才会想起小动物的撕逼劳模，就像我相信另一位老师整天把大low大俗挂在嘴边却能扒视频学技术，一定比某些有术无道的强行专业人士来得高尚。 \\n人生在世，真的藏不住，假的装也装不来，不如多一点真诚，就算碌碌好歹还能保住清白。就像二十五岁的薛老师说的—— \\n“我是个演员，只演薛之谦。” \\n \\n \\n \\n \\n最后放出薛老师的首部太监文学作品《俄罗斯长篇大论》，请各位善用只看楼主功能。 \\n第一集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270367518\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270367518</a> \\n第二集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270368659\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270368659 </a> \\n第三集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/271074837\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/271074837</a> \\n第四集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/272420678\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/272420678</a> 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\\n2008年的薛老师为了世界和平操碎了心。没事的时候撺掇谦友逃课放飞自我，汶川受灾却能站出来身体力行号召谦友大爱无疆，有钱买专辑不如拿钱捐灾区，彼时直线救灾，日后曲线救歌，谁说人生不是黑色幽默，伏笔长长一线，万事暗自关联。“为了xx，我的专辑你们就不要买了”，这个句式实在熟悉，薛老师作为歌手的套路大概就是“你们负责听歌，赚钱的麻烦事就交给我”，可歌可泣。 \\n2010年的薛老师依然保有通宵刷留言的好习惯，交流意愿强烈却时常力不从心，打字慢得不行还捎带不少错字，学习半年回帖贴图技能点依旧暗淡，经网友点拨终于晓得Ctrl+c再加v可以在回复时携带对方发帖内容，却依然固执地忘记复制分割线，将好端端一段对口攒成长诗一篇，实力演示人格分裂临床表现。然而，一篇博客日志都要写两个小时的薛老师却怀揣着跻身文坛的梦想，筹划个人长篇小说的同时不忘捉刀《俄罗斯长篇大论》，原定连载二十篇谁料中道夭折，孤零零的四篇游记摆在那儿，尾巴说好“敬请期待第五篇”也成了说说而已，甚至算不上个承诺，只是个美好的企盼，说说就算的小玩笑。 \\n2007年的薛老师为退出娱乐圈的自己想好出路，退居二线专心给别人写曲子，开家小店铺过普通人的日子，等到08年再被问到“今年的期望和打算”，直言“打算……就是做一个歌手”，这两个词之间总归有些微妙区别，打算比期望听起来更幸运一点儿，站在2016年往回看，不知道他的打算有没有成真，还是后退一步变成了无可奈何的期望。 \\n三只大闸蟹五只嘉兴粽，五碗泡饭六颗咸蛋，俄罗斯泡面和温州鸭舌，热爱食物才能拥抱生命，能吃能睡连神经衰弱都能不药而愈；最爱松狮和比熊，看到雪纳瑞也要动心。知道了些许鸡零狗碎，你会发现许多你以为他从未说过的，早就被他给出了答案。 \\n人人知道时间是单向矢量，时间里的种种却从来不是昙花一现，总有些东西伴随着时间中的我们一同被留下，你能透过它们瞥见过去的影子，就像一只眼贴在红漆木门外头，顺着罅隙往里瞧，可能使了牛劲最多看见个青砖地椅子腿，但比起站在旁边冷眼旁观的过路人，你就是能产生天大的高兴，一种不可与人言的喜悦，这些互不相关的零碎让你的想象有了方向，仿佛青砖地还是七架梁，是无光自鲜明的画壁，闭上眼就能嗅见黄花梨的清香味儿，不矫饰，不做作。 \\n我不敢断言他是个怎样的人，往天上捧更是无论如何也做不到。人就是这样，不大个身子盛着几多好坏，好的可能极好，坏的不至于极坏却也能让没缘分的人倒了胃口。有人急躁，有人笨拙，有人只在遇见挚爱的时刻才敢放下计算，有人一念执着，心里的魔障敲也敲不开，有人长一颗嫩豆腐似的心，却时刻骗自己是颗煮过了火的硬壳蛋，凡此种种，是不是蠢，是，可你能指责他些什么，你做不出，一句狠话都说不出口，因为你知道种因得果，你是，他是，人人都是。 \\n当下为人有多圆滑，过去就吃过多少苦，许多人都是这样。唱歌画画写文章的人都有压制不住的倾诉欲，有太多话想说，说了才能活，这样的人说起话来几十句里却只能有两句是真心实意的，是曾经让他疼过的，可满纸荒唐言只有这两句最令观者捧腹，这种事总会让我对这个世界更失望一分。 \\n人心里的火就是这么萎缩得半死不活。 \\n有人翻出他过去不当的言行，拿在手里二话不说就伸出指头点名他是个坏种。这话反驳起来简单，也困难。我可以列举二十条证据只为告诉人家“他是个好人”，即使放在统计学概念下不敢把话说死，这也应该算是大概率事件，但人家只说一句话就能让我哑口无言，“我不相信”。 \\n挺没劲的，真的。 \\n本来只想随意记三两个薛老师生命中的小瞬间，谁知道一写写到又要看日出，讲的这些废话丝毫不敢以理中客自居，巨蟹座生来护犊子，两位老师都是我豁出脸不要也要护着的，最后理所当然要说点儿毫无依据的表扬，反正困傻的女青年胡说胡有理。 \\n薛老师的笑话总离不开动物，大小动物不忌尺寸不顾美丑，小猫小狗犀牛河马，但凡他想起来的就要说，对此我有理由相信一个擅长无意识热爱大自然的青年必定是个天性善良的好青年，而不是一个只有在说“肉包子打狗”的时候才会想起小动物的撕逼劳模，就像我相信另一位老师整天把大low大俗挂在嘴边却能扒视频学技术，一定比某些有术无道的强行专业人士来得高尚。 \\n人生在世，真的藏不住，假的装也装不来，不如多一点真诚，就算碌碌好歹还能保住清白。就像二十五岁的薛老师说的—— \\n“我是个演员，只演薛之谦。” \\n \\n \\n \\n \\n最后放出薛老师的首部太监文学作品《俄罗斯长篇大论》，请各位善用只看楼主功能。 \\n第一集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270367518\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270367518</a> \\n第二集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270368659\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/270368659 </a> \\n第三集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/271074837\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/271074837</a> \\n第四集 \\n<a target=\\"_blank\\" rel=\\"nofollow\\" href=\\"http://tieba.baidu.com/p/272420678\\" >http://tieba.baidu.com/p/272420678</a> 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